Seasons of Love

NaBloPoMo is back. One year has passed since my endeavor to post daily for the month of November. The beginning of this blogfest finds me right on the heels of my father’s yahrzeit (the Hebrew calendar anniversary of a death).

Dad died on October 11, 2007. On October 11, 2008, I found myself in Seattle, Washington, with over a dozen of my dearest friends, the August96 moms. I was not myself on that trip. I was fragile and moody and missing my father so very much. For the first time in my life, I contemplated cutting a trip short and coming home because I was so unhappy. Thankfully, WineGuy and MB Walker talked me into staying put.

It didn’t help that I observed Yom Kippur away from home. The Jewish Day of Atonement is a time of remembrance and repentance. In keeping with my faith, I attended religious services in Seattle, and attended my first Yizkor service. (Yizkor is Judaism’s memorial service that is conducted four times a year; the first of those services takes place on Yom Kippur.) And so, I found myself way in the back of a colorful and diverse Conservative synagogue in Seattle. Alone. Weeping. It was hard being away from my husband and children, yet it was liberating to let my emotions go in front of people I’ll never see again. Those kind souls sitting near me murmured words of comfort, love, and understanding. I was grateful for their compassion. Sympathy from strangers should always be gratefully accepted because it helps heal.

Some two weeks later the official Yahrzeit date rolled around. My small synagogue here in SW Florida put out a call for a minyan (a gathering of 10+ Jewish adults) for me to say Kaddish. Nearly 20 people showed up to stand with me; I was so touched. Although I was a bit teary when I stood to say Kaddish for my father, I was very proud to hear the rabbi remember him so fondly.

Now I am left with this song echoing in my mind: “Seasons of Love” from the musical “Rent”. WineGuy and I saw it in NYC the last night of previews before it officially opened on Broadway. The song was all I could think of when my father’s brother, Uncle Ozzie, passed away in 1997. It is cathartic yet uplifting . . . like the process of mourning. May my father’s memory always be a blessing to me and my family. May his soul rise higher and higher with each prayer I say. May his wisdom and laughter live on in my heart.

Five Hundred Twenty-Five Thousand
Six Hundred Minutes
Five Hundred Twenty-Five Thousand
Moments so dear
Five Hundred Twenty-Five Thousand
Six Hundred Minutes
How Do You Measure – Measure A Year?
In Daylights – In Sunsets
In Midnights – In Cups Of Coffee
In Inches – In Miles
In Laughter – In Strife

In – Five Hundred Twenty-Five Thousand
Six Hundred Minutes
How Do You Measure
A Year In The Life?

How About Love?
How About Love?
How About Love?
Measure In Love

Seasons of Love.
Seasons of Love.

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4 thoughts on “Seasons of Love

  1. Hugs to you, Alto2. It looks like our August Moms reunions will fall during a hard time of year for you – hopefully, we can give you friendship and support and a little bit of space too.

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